What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Are there any more 'nun' jokes?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Why do so many people suddenly think it's acceptable to continue to live with their parents into adulthood?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

What are some best sources of great porn?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Why is Bollywood failing?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Do all you people that took the "jab" feel lied to yet?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Have you ever had your crush reject you, and then later you all dated and married?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Has anyone ever participated in a gang bang and what was it like?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Why do some films seem to date/age so badly?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Can you recommend a simple song with an awesome solo? What makes the solo stand out?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Beautiful European women were killed by inquisition but Russia was not Catholic. Is this the reason for a drastic difference explaining why Russian women are the prettiest?

TEXT:

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

What is a good investment portfolio for someone starting in their 20s? 90% VT and 10% BND for a Roth IRA then 100% TDF for a 401k?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …